A Lifeboat for Our Learners: What ACCESS Gave Our Family

10/3/2025 10:23 am

When my daughter was in kindergarten, I asked her teacher about ACCESS. She told me not to apply - that ACCESS was only for misbehaving boys. So we didn’t. Every year after that, during conferences, I heard the same refrain: my daughter was “fine.” She was quiet, a top performer, and never asked for anything. But fine is not thriving. Fine is a four-letter word.

When my son entered kindergarten a few years later, it was a different story. I'll highlight an example that was typical of his experience at the neighborhood school: One regular kindergarten math assignment was to create equations with the classroom number of the day. He wrote one with exponents, using them accurately, and his teacher got upset, chastising him (and later me) for knowing “too much.” Early in the year I nominated him for TAG testing in both math and intellect. He scored in the 99th and 98th percentiles. His teacher commented how surprised she was by the results - which told me how little she had actually engaged with him. No one else who knew my son was surprised.

The ACCESS application at the time asked what the neighborhood school was doing to meet his needs. His teacher’s response was: “I gave him a standing desk away from other children.” He was not prone outbursts, violence, or dysregulation. He simply finished his work quickly and then tried to help classmates. Rather than recognize his need for more challenging work, she isolated him away from her and his classmates. She also noted that he was gregarious but not really connecting with peers. That response made it painfully clear how inadequate the school would be in meeting his academic and social needs.

We applied to ACCESS but were wait-listed for first grade. Then came CDL (the distance learning year of the pandemic). For both of my children, it was a gift - they could finally learn at their own pace. I’m not an educator, but I made sure they used all the district’s tools and supplemented with Outschool classes. Always hungry for more and finally able to move at a faster pace, they thrived academically.

In spring 2021, while my son was still in first grade at the neighborhood school, I began requesting meetings with his principal to prepare SSA placement for second grade. I CC’d the TAG coordinator and his teacher. Over the course of six weeks I sent half a dozen emails, but the principal ignored every one. Even my son's classroom teacher admitted the principal’s silence was inappropriate and unprofessional. I was on the verge of escalating to the district office and our catchment's  Senior Director of Schools when the email came: my son had been offered a spot at ACCESS for second grade. It felt like a lifeboat had appeared. I could finally stop fighting tooth and nail.

At ACCESS, he immediately tested into third-grade math, made many fast friends, and found peers who loved being around him. He went from being isolated and unconnected to being joyously accepted and appreciated.

Meanwhile, his older sister was still at our neighborhood school in fifth grade. Her teacher confided that students in her class ranged from second-grade readers to high school-level readers - my daughter among the latter. Differentiation at that level was impossible. Due to her advanced level, my daughter spent much of fifth grade excused from english and math lessons, sent to help the art teacher instead. She applied to ACCESS for sixth grade, was accepted, and spent 6th-8th grade finally learning with joy and relief.

ACCESS changed both my children’s trajectories. Without it, my daughter would have remained “fine” - overlooked, under-challenged, and unseen. Without it, my son would have gone from being isolated and frustrated to deeply unhappy, forced to work far below his abilities, and perhaps eventually refusing school altogether. Instead, he is now a 6th grader taking high school Algebra 1. He went from having no friends to being a part of a wide circle of friends and peers who understand and inspire him. ACCESS gave both of my children what every student deserves: challenge, community, and the chance to truly thrive.

- Parent of an ACCESS alum & 6th grader